Skip to main content

Help! My Daughter Is Driving Me Crazy.

Today, I will be the one venting and please do not judge me.  I am sure I am not the only one who has felt this way. However, I am the only one who choses to speak on it. I will give you all a synopsis.

I have a 19 year old and 13 year old. They are like night and day. For the past few days, my 13 year has been getting on my last nerve. So much so, today I wanted to pop her in the mouth because she thinks she is suppose to have the last word. Instead I raised my voice an octave and put the fear of God in her.  I ended with the statement, "I  don't know who you think you are talking to, but I am not one of your friends. Do not play with me little girl. Consider this your warning".

I went into my internal mommy space and had a woosah moment. I had a talk with myself. I said to myself, "Girl, I am glad you did not pop your daughter in the mouth. You know why she is lashing out. Now you have to find a way to deal with the issue at hand. You have to remain calm so your blood pressure does not escalate. You do not want social workers intruding in your life. Let them intrude in the lives of those who truly neglect, abuse and mistreat their children. If you forgot, let me remind you that you are too pretty for jail so you definitely have to find a way for you to keep your composure or you will become a resident of the Rose M. Singer Center (RMSC) on Rikers Island". 

I proceeded to my car and waited for her to come down stairs. During the drive to school we did not speak. She tried talking and I did not respond at least not right away. Eventually, she apologized for speaking out of term. I accepted her apology. I proceeded to tell her when you apologize for something, you are acknowledging your wrong doing and you try your best not to repeat the wrong doing. If you find yourself repeating the same behavior and action then your apology meant nothing. It is up to you to prove to me that your apology was sincere.

I ended the conversation stating, "daughter the situation that occurred this morning was inappropriate, but that does not mean I don't love you. It is very clear there is a deeper problem. We both have things we need to work on to prevent you from lashing out and to prevent me from reacting to your actions. I love you and have a good day at school.

How many of you are raising or has raised teen daughters? Have you felt this way? How did you resolve the issue?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Who Do You Identify With In The Sea Of Life?

While attending Medgar Evers College , I was introduced to the worlds renowned author  Ms. Iyanla Vanzant . My public speaking professor began each class with a daily meditation from Acts of Faith which was authored by Ms. Vanzant. Eventually, I purchased this book and a few others. Years later, I continue to read the Acts of Faith. Photo Credit: RaisingBrownGirls While sitting at my desk, I turned to today's meditation and my eyes made it's way to the bottom of the page. The message stated "I know who I am in the sea of life." After reading it, I reversed it and asked myself two questions. "Do you know who you are in the sea of life?" "Who do you identify with in the sea of life?" My eyes scrolled back to the top of the page and I began to read today's daily meditation. As I am reading, I realize I have encountered almost every fish that was mentioned. This made me think about the people I have crossed paths with in the past,

A Rainbow of My Own

While sitting in the middle of my bed after waking up for the second time today, guess what I saw on my bedroom wall? A rainbow. Before you ask, no there was nothing in my window and there was nothing on my television stand that allowed any sort of reflection. I was baffled and amazed. Yet I continued to stare at it until it faded. I believe it was God's way of getting my attention. His way of communicating and relaying his message to me. There have been days when life seems to get the best of me. I have so much on my mind. It seems as though it is constantly racing. It never slows down or stop. As a result, I often have sleepless nights. There have been times when I wanted to give up which was the easiest thing to do. However, I know that quitting is never an option and not the example I want to set for my two brown girls. I know it is only because of God's grace that my strength grows and I can move forward. I often pray and talk to God. However, I have been prayin

Thank You God

I just want to tell you that God is Good. He will use others to be a blessing in your life. I already told God Thank you, but I wanted to Thank God in Public. As I prepare myself for online service at Emmanuel Baptist Church, I began to reflect on some of the things that some people say out of that thing they call a mouth.  Then I realize people say things because they do not know any better. They do not know God and what he is capable of doing. But if it was not for his Grace (God blessing us when we do not deserve it) and Mercy (God not punishing us when our sins deserve it) where would you be today? Where would I be today?  Someone did not wake up this morning, but you were blessed to see another day. You did not wake your self up #GodDidThat. You are blessed to have your five senses for another day, #GodDidThat. Someone lost their job last week and may not be able to provide for their family, but that pink slip bypassed your desk #GodDidThat. My faith has been shook several times,